FESTIVAL SPIRIT

When I think of festivals, I think, “Trench foot”, “Where am I going to pee?” and, “I’m too old”. Then there are the things I can’t live without: a hot-water bottle with a Malo cashmere cover, Charlotte Eatwell hand-quilted cushions, Diptyque candles – you know, life’s essentials. So I skip the season and have no friends between June and September.

These days, however, accommodation ranges from extravagantly themed B&Bs to the chic sari-clad “bivouacs” at Bestival, above, courtesy of Josie, the wife of the organiser, Rob da Bank. When I see that kind of attention to detail, I’m curious, so I’ve been seeking advice from festival aficionados.

Zoë Ball was encouraging: “The hippieish escapism of being en masse with 20 or 30 friends is like taking over a hotel for a mate’s wedding, only wilder. When I first went to Glastonbury, I saw Joe Strummer’s gang in their brightly coloured tents, with Jools Holland and his wife standing on the steps of their painted gypsy caravan next door.” I like the sound of painted caravans, though VW Campers are more practical.

Edith Bowman suggests Bestival as a good festival for me, as the bohemian bivouacs should appeal to my inner home girl. To make one her own, Bowman takes a sleeping bag, a scented candle and a homemade flag.

Luckily, my friend Jo, a veteran festival-goer, is on hand to help. We’re off to Glastonbury in an Airstream camper van (the retro silver design is much easier on the eye than a Winnebago). It has a great loo, so I won’t even have to worry about the state of the facilities.

A STITCH IN TIME

The sassy cross-stitcher Kate Westerholt is known for her needlework featuring racy messages alongside 18th and 19th-century motifs such as birds and houses (she spends hours researching in the V&A textile archives). Each piece takes days to make and costs about £1,000, so I’m thrilled that her Get Your Freak On sampler is going to be turned into a limited-edition print. It will be a sound investment, if the originals, which have trebled in value in three years, are anything to go by.

From £120, from www.nellyduff.com

FLY BUYS: Festival junkies’ essential fixes

1 Gimme shelter: looking for your tent at a festival can be like trying to find your car in the Bluewater car park, so invest in a Paint-Your-Own Festival Tent from Millets. Project an image of your choice onto the side and get painting. £79.99; 0800 389 5861, www.millets.co.uk.

2 Drink and be merry: I’m loving Alessi’s Parrot corkscrew, a classic that will impress the design-savvy, and Fred Nose paper cups. Parrot corkscrew, £23, from Alessi; 020 7518 9090, www.alessi.com. Paper cups, £6.95 for 24, from Cubic; 020 7095 9399, www.cubicuk.com.

3 Go green (not that you have much choice, given that the average wigwam doesn’t have a socket): choose from One Earth’s range of sleeping bags made from recycled plastic bottles, its wind-up lanterns, phone-chargers and torches, and its combi radio-and-torch-in-one (although do note that these are examples of function over form). From £9.99, from Millets, as before.

4 Get a costume: between-gig lulls can be dull as ditchwater. Zoë Ball took a Bungle outfit to a festival last year (“It can provide hours of entertainment”), while Big Bird and Cookie Monster both appeared at the V Festival. I’m thinking a Womble or Chewbacca would raise a smile. Hit your local costume-hire joint and get fancy-dressed up.

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