As you read this, I’m on holiday in Suffolk. In between raking leaves and splitting logs, I am wondering what is happening back at my home in London. Are youths in balaclavas scrawling on the sitting-room walls in last year’s paint colours? During Christmases past, I’ve not given a single thought to how safe my house might be, but this year is different — because I have the V900 GSM, or, to give it its snappier name, the Eye camera. Now I’m able to check my walls for citrus-green graffiti from more than 100 miles away.

The Eye is a little larger than an iPod and sits on a 360-degree swivel stand. Its motion sensor operates up to a distance of about 100ft, with 68-degree coverage, and it will send texts or e-mails alerting you to any disturbance. It also functions as a remote hearing device, and — this is the riveting bit — you can ask it to take a snapshot at any time and send the image to your mobile.

Because, quaintly, I have no phone reception in my cottage, I’m continually walking up the hill, in the biting wind, to text my Eye. A few minutes later, chilled to the bone, I’m looking at a picture of my nice, cosy London living room, and see — yep, nothing is happening. Again. It’s like the dullest reality-TV show ever conceived, and I’m addicted. The dog is thrilled with our new hourly walking routine, too.

When I received the Eye a week or so ago, my heart sank. New stuff is never plain sailing for me. Every life-improving techie addition to my daily routine has come at a cost of days of disruption and call-centre misery. The words “plug and play” make me very, very angry indeed.

Yet David Martin, who discovered the product in Hong Kong and helped to develop the software for UK users, has written a simple single-sheet user guide. Best of all, if you get stuck, he’s happy to talk you through the process. He can even take control of your camera remotely, have a look at what you might have done wrong, then set it up properly. This probably won’t be necessary. Martin has sold about 300 of the devices since the UK launch in September, and can’t remember many calls, he tells me during an especially long phone session.

Before you plug and play (grrr), you need to make sure your mobile is set up to receive MMS messages: the iPhone is not MMS-friendly, so needs to receive data as e-mails instead. Your mobile can then talk to the camera’s Sim card, and voilà: you’re ready to spy. A pay-as-you-go Vodafone card is included, but you can use one from any network; messages sent from the camera are charged at standard rates.

Who has been buying so far?

“People with caravans, boats or second homes,” says Martin, who has holiday homes in Thailand. There, police advise foreign owners to install CCTV — and, unwilling to pay thousands of pounds for a full monitoring service, Martin set out to find an inexpensive, user-friendly alternative. The Eye is a great little product that probably can’t be bettered if you own a boat or caravan, or a small flat.

For a house with several rooms, however, there are choices to be made. Which room to monitor? Entertaining as I’ve found it is to gaze at snaps of the fireplace, I think for my next holiday, I should place the camera near an entry point.

There is another small drawback — the Eye can be tough on the health. My constant outdoor surveillance activities have resulted in a streaming cold, so I’m going home early this year.

The Eye camera costs £245, inc p&p, from Eye Spy Security; 020 8687 0136, www.eye-spy-security.co.uk

Three more ways to keep tabs on your home

Alert Me security kit from £249

Plug this neat system into your broadband connection and it sends e-mails or texts to you, your neighbours or anyone else you nominate if its sensors are tripped. A £10 monthly service charge applies. 0800 021 3215, www.alertme.com

Y-Cam from £115

Small, neat and relatively easy to install — indoors or out — the wireless Y-Cam will monitor and record what is happening in or around your home for a £10 monthly charge. 0845 241 6040, www.camvista.co.uk

T Home Monitor VP1000 £176

This intelligent house-alarm system will alert you to intruders via e-mail, text message or a call to a UK land line. It can be managed via a personal password-protected online account for £5 a month. www.shop.bt.com

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