Why does the mere thought of “retirement developments” send a shudder down the spine? Looked at dispassionately, they are an eminently sensible idea — a land where it’s forever Sunday, there’s always a round of golf to play and there’s nursing help at hand, if needed.

But there’s something about the idea of homes comprising entirely elderly people that horrifies — even if they are our near contemporaries. To find out how we might cope at some time in the future I went with my wife, Jenny (she is 51 and I am 53), to spend a weekend at Audley Life’s flagship country house, Flete House at Ermington in Devon. Dating from the 1540s but largely Victorian Gothic, it’s an imposing pile. Arriving on the Friday evening, we are shown to our guest suite — a one-bedroom apartment with a fair-sized kitchen and cosy sitting room. It’s bright and funky, with light Paula Rosa kitchen units and a swish, gleaming white Heritage bathroom suite. In fact, it’s the sort of show flat you’d see in any city centre block aimed at affluent twentysomethings; there’s not a stair lift, a panic button or any other geriatric gadgetry to be seen. And it’s priced at £210,000 — about right for a studio apartment in London.

So far so good. But what do you do with your days as a resident of Flete House? On the Saturday we find out. There’s golf on the two local courses, tennis on the new court near the terrace, table tennis, croquet, snooker, reading in the library or walking in the 12 acres of landscaped grounds. We choose the grounds and they really are quite spectacular.

But one thing concerns me — hardly anybody else seems to be doing anything. The senior resident, Lady M, aged 102, is heroically tackling a huge jigsaw in the library but otherwise the place seems deathly quiet. I know five residents have passed away in the past year but where is everyone else from Flete House’s 30 apartments?

“You misunderstand the concept of Audley,” says Claire Thomson, a sales consultant. “We aren’t an institution; this is independent living in a home of your own with leisure amenities and support services available as and when you want them.

People don’t have to be doing anything.” She goes on to assure me that this laid-back philosophy is what makes Audley’s developments so popular. The company is opening new sites, sales are flourishing and, interestingly, the average age of prospective residents appears to be dropping. Two sets of residents arriving soon will be only in their mid-fifties. Each plans to use Flete House as a “lockup and leave” UK base while spending most of the year in Spain and France respectively.

And then there are those who have tried retirement living and opted to move on. Cue Peter Rees-Smith and Judy Hill. He, a former England international hockey player, is the youngest, fittest, 81-year-old I have seen in my life, and she is a feisty, glamorous 62. They moved here from their large country home outside Ledbury, Worcestershire, just a year ago. They are currently selling the £465,000 apartment, to which they ask us for drinks. Have they enjoyed Flete House?

“Living here has been rather like living in a good hotel — we couldn’t fault the service, the staff or the amenities,” says Peter. “But time hangs rather heavily sometimes. You have to plan your days and you have to get out or it becomes claustrophobic. I have made friends in the local pub and we meet every Friday. That has become quite important to me.”

They look back happily over their stay at Flete House as we make our way down the oak-panelled staircase for dinner. This meal, incidentally, is an optional extra — £10 for two courses midweek and £11.50 at weekends to add to the basic management charges of £6,500 a year.

So, it must be asked, why are Peter and Judy leaving? “Peter’s toys — simple as that,” says Judy. “He owns four cars and he wants to tinker with them, so he needs garages. He is simply the least successful down-sizer in the country.”

Peter adds: “It’s also your garden. Judy had an acre of gardens, including a lovely orchard, which she adored.” And Judy says: “I could also do with more shops, which is why we have a house in Sidmouth in mind. But it’s mainly your wretched cars. We didn’t think it through.”

Is a retirement development an option I’d consider myself? As we leave Flete House. with the flag flying at half mast again, it’s a tricky question. One day, perhaps. But not yet. One-bedroom and two-bedroom apartments are available at Flete House from £199,000 to £550,000. Telephone Claire Thomson, 01752 830308, or Marchand Petit, 01548 831163. www.audleylife.co.uk

FACTBOX

There will be a 30 per cent increase in the number of people in the UK who are aged over 50 by 2028.

In retirement hotspots such as parts of Norfolk and Dorset, three fifths of the population will be middle aged or elderly by 2028. Both figures are from Newcastle University’s Centre for the Rural Economy.

The private sector has built only 80,000 dedicated retirement units in Britain. Fewer than 3,000 are added each year — half the number that the Retirement Housing Group says is needed.

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