By all accounts, it was the best of weekends. On Saturday, my League Cup Final
tickets arrived, and we toughed it out to secure three hard-earned points up
at Derby. The next day, I got my sister back, and had a front row seat to
see her kick ass and take over the world.
Not that I or any of the family held out much hope that this day was going to
come. A few weeks earlier, a visit to Amy’s flat with my girlfriend Hayley
saw Amy still struggling to conquer her demons. Clearly in the wake of a hit
from the old crack pipe, it was hard to take in that the barely
communicative shell in front of us was my own flesh and blood. A few days
later came that video leak, and the emergency meeting with Lucian Grainge
that finally got her into rehab. That had been the last time I had seen her.
I should mention here that we all knew how bad her condition was. There was
never any denial on the part of my parents, whose fears and anxiety over
their only daughter had made them both ill. Dad was on the verge of a
breakdown, and Mum . . . well, Mum was Mum – stoic on the outside, but one
can only guess at the torment that was going on within.
So Amy entered rehab, and Mum and Dad could relax slightly. She wasn’t allowed
visitors, but the reports we got were all good. Detox was tough but she did
it. Getting her back on foods proved to be more of a problem, but she
started to put on weight. She was still eating rubbish – a trait we share
courtesy of our father’s penchant for anything that could result in an early
onset of diabetes – but she was keeping it down rather than bolting for the
nearest toilet. She was even ready, it was whispered, for the Grammys.
Only the US Government didn’t see it that way. Visa denied, her hopes of
making it out to Los Angeles were dashed, and she was gutted. Despite having
the visa eventually granted, it came too late for her to fly to the States,
and so it came to be that, rather than sharing a stage with Tony Ben-nett at
the Staples Centre, she’d be taking in the evening with her family in
London. LA’s loss was most definitely our gain.
It was without a shadow of a doubt the greatest night our family has enjoyed
in a long, long time. Having not seen her since that fateful night, I had no
idea what kind of state she’d be in. Dad, despite having spent more time
with her than I, was a tense, nervous wreck, snapping at everyone in sight.
Mum was, as expected, the very definition of stoicism. The OED should
take note. Fortunately, two glasses of champagne steadied my nerves. We were
by no means alone on this particular matter. If a close family member lived
within decent driving distance of the Riverside Studios, they were in
attendance. Amy’s oldest friends, Juliette, Jessica and Lauren, were keen to
show their support. Indeed, it was as if everyone crammed in to the studio
knew they were about to witness something great. However, greatness, of
course, isn’t always accompanied by something good.
But, as history will now record, our fears were misguided. The first time we
heard her was from behind the stage curtain, as she took the mickey out of
the stage manager telling the audience how to behave. Her banter was
sparkling and funny. There were to be two rehearsals. We took our seats, I
took a big swig from my glass, and the curtain came up. And there was my
sister, looking and sounding better than I had seen her in two years.
If I told you she sounded good in rehearsals, then her live performance was
truly from another planet. This girl, lucky if she’s measured at 5ft 2in
without heels and beehive, strode the stage like a giant. Sitting there
watching her was like watching a triumphant ending of a biopic. She had put
everything into this performance, and it showed with each perfect note,
every knowing glance at the television cameras. It was an electrically
charged performance that sent kilowatts through the audience. Never mind
that it was four in the morning – the place was literally jumping, with all
thoughts of sleep forgotten.
Her reaction to winning the Best Record award was genuine and truly moving.
For the first time in God only knows how long, my parents were truly happy,
and Amy was too. So of course was I. We hugged and kissed, and suddenly the
world melted away; we were alone, a loving family that has suffered so much
and – we deeply wish – come out the other side.
I spoke to her later as she went for a quiet fag, and she was as bright and
vivacious as she had been before her demons took over. That was my happiest
moment of the night. We were able to have a normal conversation, chatting
about her wanting to learn to drive, the pros and cons of wearing a
handlebar moustache (a look I’m trying to cultivate, courtesy of too many
hours watching Deadwood), how Hayley was, and yes, even being off
drugs. She didn’t miss crack, she told me, and was glad to be rid of it,
which was a nice thing to hear. She ended by telling me that she was
planning to go quad-biking with the Osbournes at some point, which was cool,
until I remembered that this particular pursuit nearly killed Ozzy. So,
something else to worry about. Still, it makes a change to have a trivial
concern. Cigarette finished, we returned to our family to say our goodnights
and head home.
Yes, the best of weekends. Spurs continue their resurgence, but most
importantly of all very definite signs that Amy – the real Amy – is back
among us. The hope, of course, is that this time it’s for real.
— Lucian Grainge, head of Universal Music Europe, is credited
with forcing Amy Winehouse into rehab by presenting her with cuttings
documenting her downfall.
A source at Universal said: “Lucian got every piece of press from around the
world. He then laid everything out and summoned Amy. He told her to have a
good look, then tell him she hadn’t got a drugs problem. It did the trick.”
Mr Grainge began as an A&R scout in 1978. He is also in charge of U2 and
50 Cent, the rapper.
First British singer to win five Grammy Awards
September 14, 1983
Amy Jade Winehouse is born. Brought up in Southgate, North London, she gets
her first guitar at 13. She is later expelled from the Sylvia Young Theatre
School for piercing her nose
October 20, 2003
She releases her debut album, Frank – described by The Times
as “earthy, warm, lived-in and astonishingly versatile”. It is nominated for
a Mercury Music Prize
October 30, 2006
Her next album, Back to Black, is released in Britain to critical
acclaim. It goes platinum five times, selling 1.85 million copies and
becoming the bestselling album of 2007
February 14, 2007
Best Female Artist at the Brit Awards
May 18, 2007
Winehouse marries boyfriend Blake Fielder-Civil secretly in Miami, Florida
August 2007
She cancels shows, citing exhaustion and ill health. Both she and
Fielder-Civil enter rehab for drug addiction but leave after five days
August 23, 2007
The couple depart the Sanderson hotel covered in blood and leaving a cleaning
bill of £3,000
October 2007
Winehouse and her husband are arrested in Norway for possession of cannabis
November 9, 2007
Fielder-Civil is arrested on a charge of trying to pervert the course of
justice in relation to an assault in East London. He allegedly offered the
victim £200,000 to withdraw his complaint
December 2, 2007
Winehouse is photographed outside her home barefoot and wearing a bra and
jeans
January 22, 2008
The Sun publishes a video of a woman alleged to be the singer,
apparently smoking crack
January 24, 2008
Winehouse checks into rehab
February 10, 2008
She wins five Grammy Awards – the first British female artist to do so –
including Best Pop Album, Song of the Year and Record of the Year
I work with persons suffering from addiction and mental health issues including eating disorders and self-harm. I am a Therapist. Amy is in the grips of a terribly complicated and incredibly difficult struggle. The money and fame just make it more difficult. I admire her efforts to recover.
Chuck, San Francisco, USA
Simply, Amy doesn't care what we think. Whether we want to save her, damn her, or shoot her, she just doesn't care. Review any of her interviews or listen to her music, it says it all. And seeing her lately? She's not contrite or humble. Her voice is sublime, but time to grow up or quit the business
R. Burke, Portland, Oregon, USA
I wonder if this girl understands the gr8ness of her talents. Her prolific writing and singing skills,the way she can't dance; but it looks good on stage. I think she should listen to her own words in BROTHER; she'll be able to make her mum proud and help herself off addiction. Keep the faith AMY.
STEPHAN, birmingham, united kingdom
oh Amy if you only knew how much we love you...
april, kingston, Jamaica
I like Amy and all that, but am frankly quite bored of her and all her shenanigans. Are there no other talented British singers we can talk about!
Sheila, London,
Amy Winehouse is THE best female artist we have produced for years. Her lyrics, her voice, her look, what a fantastic combination, long may she continue to produce music of the calibre of B2B. Good luck to her and her Blake.
Gail Woods, Banff, Aberdeenshire
Since I first bought B2B its been rarely out of my head.
I'm old enough to have been around when Hendrix, Morrison, and Joplin died, and when all the articles came out on Amy's spiral I thought, Oh No...please ,No.
I even couldn't bear to listen to 'Rehab' anymore as it became a kind of suicide note that people were awarding her for.
Its great to read that she's clearly has the love and support of her family, and I hope I get to hear her talent for songs/lyrics/phrasing unfold for the rest of all our natural lives.
Don, Canberra, Oz
I really feel for Amy. She is one of the best singers I have ever heard. I hope that she finds peace within and deal with the cause of her pain . Her music is so real and expressive that it reaches within the soul. I also hope that her husband finds peace also. Nobody can judge them because everyone have their own way of expressing pain. Amy , you are young , beautifull, and gifted and you need to own it. I pray for you and your husband every day. One thing I would love to do before I leave this earth is to see you live in concert but most important see you at peace.
Demitri, pearland, texas
All I have to say is, glad she's still around and hope she stays. Hearing her voice for the first time was like a curtain being lifted on all the boring, stereotypical and repetitive music out there. All I ask is for more Amy Winehouse albums, and more of that amazing voice. Hang in there, Miss W -- you're doing great!
Mazarine, Melbourne, Australia
Many thanks to Alex for sharing his love and concern for his sister with us. Obviously, her family has been worried sick about her, and so have many fans from around the world...including me!
Natalie Cole's comments were out of line, especially since she fought her own demons "back in the day". Uh, "Snow Queen"...anyone remember that? Yeah, Kettle, Pot...you know the rest.
Amy's talent is AMAZING and her music has touched my soul. I wish only the very best for her and her family.
Tika, Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
I agree with joseph jackson - of course the grammy's aren't there to reward bad behaviour surely its to do with record sales - hello!!
Why do people insist on saddling people especially young women like amy and britney spears and lily allen with this 'responsibility' rubbish. Its just another way to heap judgement on people who clearly aren't perfect - but are just doing their job. Amy has a great talent and is simply herself. If you don't like her personal life stop reading about it and keep your nose out!
Esther Dayo, Walthamstow, United Kingdom
Having never met Amy Winehouse, I can only go off two things.
1 She has a terrific voice and talent. 2 She seems very family-orientated and likeable. Good luck to her and hope she brings out some more songs in that irresistable voice>
janet, brinscall, england
why are people talking about an artist as a role model??? they are supposed to give us art, not moral examples.
k. fergus from toronto: amy winehouse one and only responsibility towards her audience is to give them what they want: her music.
her grammys are more than well deserved. she is in a totally different league from alicia keys, beyonce, rhianna and all the other extremely bland artists that were at the grammys.
when she started singing at the grammys I just could not believe it, it brought tears to my eyes. just to think that less than a month ago she was completely messed up. and the look on her face when she won the record of the year award¡
she is real, she is human, and she is a wonderful artist.
tete, buenos aires, argentina
Well done Amy, both for beating the demons and for winning the grammys. Keep it up, 'cos we're looking foreward to the next album.
Dave Ferris, Bournemouth, United Kingdom
Amy Wineshouse is not the first addict musician nor will she be the last. Natalie Cole was quick to point fingers but she's had past substance abuse issues herself. A little hypocrasy anyone?? Amy is immensely talented and I sincerely hope she stays on the right track. If the world is going to be hard on Amy Winehouse then we need to be that way with all celebrities and not pick and choose who we are going to turn a blind eye to.
Ana Pitt, West Memphis, Arkansas
While I agree with some comments here that being a celebrity seems to make you immune to being charged with drug possession, while the plebs suffer for just having a joint in their pocket, I have to say that Amy Winehouse is one of our (Britian's), if not the, most talented musician we have.
I have followed her story with a mixture of total disbelief and sadness. She is a gorgeous young woman with absolutely everything anyone could wish for. Her voice is amazing, she is beautiful and yet she wastes her life on her deadbeat husband.
I wish with all my heart that Amy gets better and becomes a spokesman for the dangers of drugs rather than a walking advert for them.
Amy, please listen to your parents, they love you and can see what is best for you. Sometimes people cannot see the wood for the trees and so have to rely on their family (no one else) to pull them through.
kim, London,
Amy is showing herself to be as strong of a person as she is a musician by going to rehab and sticking with rehab, all under close watch of the public eye. I am a 24 year old musician from the states, and have always felt so connected to Amy and her music- partly because it is pure genius!- and partly because we are both 24 year old women who love to sing jazz. Kudos to you Ms. Winehouse for taking charge and conquering your demons. While I will probably be singing in small pubs and karaoke bars the rest of my life, you will go down in history as one of the greats! Cheers!
Miranda Nelson, Minneapolis, MN
Her family are the real victims in this story and also the most important source of support.
Good luck to them and Amy in the years to come.
Rob Mc Hardy, Paris, France
The awards are for the music, not the social responsibility. It's right to recognise talent, excellence and hard work. Anyone who has suffered anything like this can only empathise with Amy, and wish her well. Surely she hasn't slipped off her perch because she believes that's the way to go, but simply because that's where the forces of nature have taken her. She's still learning like the rest of us. Examples and lessons to the kids have to be given by parents, teachers etc., not celebrities.
Joseph Jackson, Newcastle, UK
Maybe Amy can set an example to millions, by staying off drugs. Let it be the success story it deserves to be for her, her family and her fans. We do not get many chances in life, when one comes along, we would be stupid to throw it all away especially over drugs that at the end of the day fix absolutely nothing!
Mark Harris, Swansea, Wales
I happen to agree with Natalie Cole. People like Amy Winehouse have a responsibility to set a good example to those young people who are her audience. She has done anything but that. To reward her behaviour with 5 Grammys is unconscionable. It proves once again that famous people are rewarded for their poor judgment and illegal actions, while the average person possessing a joint is usually punished. I don't feel sorry for her because of the pressure created by her fame. If she can't stand the heat, she should get out of the kitchen!! If she continues her downward spiral, these Grammys will be her last because she will not survive.
K. Fergus, Toronto, Canada
Amy was triumphant and her live performance was amazing. Things worked out well in the end--her family and countrymen got to see her stellar performance and we saw the video link.
Stay well, Amy. I'm pulling for you, and for Pete Doherty, to combat your demons.
Carolyn Bongiorno, Glenham, NY U.S.A.